Dear Couple On A Date,
Your date would be so much more fun if you got off your cell phones and tried talking to each other. You don't need to live update the event on Yelp, Twitter, or Facebook; and, your bff's feelings can wait until brunch tomorrow.
Sincerely,
The Waitress
p.s. Wine is a wonderful social lubricant and we serve around a dozen wines by the glass and if you need more help we have a lot more wines by the bottle. Also may I recommend you start with oysters and end with the chocolate torte?
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